Remember When...

Does it ever happen to you that you run across a song, smell, sound, tasste, or person that reminds you of something? I'm sure there are many other triggers. It happens for me most often with scent. The smells of foods remind me of July Fourth or the Thanksgiving in my parents' house; perfumes remind me of significant people and the sorority house. I bet I could spot Summer Sorbet from a mile away. Ahhhhhh.............

These triggers can bring back a flood of memories that fill you with euphoria, delight, pleasure...or conversely, remorse, saddness, anger. I welcome these triggers and find intrigue in placing the exact feeling, time, and place that I first experienced the trigger.

Today, a person was my trigger. I met with a friend to help him out with a job for his company. He's been one my friends for a little over a year, and I am good friends with his wife and enjoy her company. But I haven't seen this friend in four or five months and talk to him very irregularly. His wife and I communicate much more often and about very important topics such as The Bachelor, cooking, shopping....oh and her children, huband, friends, house and my career, friends, and house. Anyway, a friendship that you really want and find comfort in. Like we can go without communication for years and come back and pick up right where we left off. I always want to be friends with this couple.

So I met with my friend (they guy in the couple), enjoyed seeing him and catching up, and remembered a time when we were much closer. There was once a time when he knew everything about my life. As I sat and listened to him talk about A&M softball, my throat closed up and I could recall a time where I thought I'd be close friends with him forever. And his wife. And his children.

We met, agreed to some terms for work, smiled at each other and said we'd be in touch soon. I know he believes I'm a capable person, as he's told me as much. And then I left and got in my car, drove out of the parking lot, and as I got several hundred yards away, I couldn't stop the tears from coming to my eyes and all the feelings and emotions of a time that wasn't too long ago. I replayed conversations and encounters and allowed my heart to entertain all of the questions that I once had.

I say all of this because it is food for thought. Is this bad? Normal? Am I not supposed to be friends with them because it makes me replay a brief experience of mine that ended in a lot of hurt? Why does this come back and why won't God take it away permanently? Because I'm so happy and things are going SO WELL in all areas of my life right now, is this little experience something that Satan is using to derail me, make me question and wonder, scare me, and wound me? Well...it's working.