A little boy interrupted me no less than 10 times this morning. I tried ignoring it, redirecting the behavior, correcting him, praising others, and allowing him to speak. I was using my good teacher strategies.
But he just wouldn't shut up. You know you've been pushed over the edge when you want to use the worstest words Kindergarteners have ever heard...aka "the bad words": SHUT UP! I strongly considered it and I was ready to argue my case to the parent and administration, and the superindent if need be, to justify using such horrific a term.
Instead, I abandoned all good teacher strategies and even the sh- word and resorted to the extremely-long-run-on-sentence-and-clenched-teeth-and-stern-voice-to-petrify-anyone-younger-than-10-voice and said:
"If you don't stop complaining and interrupting me and crying and whining RIGHT NOW I'm going to personally call Santa himself and tell him that you should be on the naughty list because you are being SO NAUGHTY RIGHT NOW and he'll bring you coal in your shoes like when I was in first grade and we took a nap and took off our shoes and I woke up and Santa gave me coal in my shoes and all the other boys and girls got presents and DO YOU WANT COAL OR DO YOU WANT TO SHAPE UP AND BE A BIG BOY?"
You are invited to my Teacher of the Year reception. The date is to be determined.
True story about how I got coal in my shoes. Do you think I'm over it yet? I cried a little to myself after I told the kid about the coal because I think it was a repressed memory.
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