In One Ear...

I hear so much throughout the day. I hear a lot, but I don't listen to a lot. Well, maybe I do. But the vast majority of what I listen to doesn't make sense, is incorrect, or I quickly wave off as I try to undo the damage that has been done.

Because I spend my day with little children. Snotty-nosed, sometimes wet their pants (or worse), petri dish of germs, impatient, loud, needy children. And I love it. Because they say stuff like this:

"Nee how!" Over and over and over. I heard "Nee how!" at least 17 times today from a little boy. He's very clever and has learned how to say "Hello!" in Chinese.

It would have been adorable if I was the ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher, and praise the Lord that I am not. Because I have a hard enough time teaching children my first language.

I finally had to say, "J! STOP speaking in Chinese!" Did anyone ask another person today to stop speaking in another language? And mean it sincerely?

Then I heard a little girl say, "My daddy has a panther on his leg!" And I could only hope that it's a tattoo. But then again, is that any better? She was very enthusiastic about her daddy's big panther tattoo on the outside of his calf. I giggled to myself because this man does not seem like the type to 1. have a tattoo and B. have a tattoo of a giant panther on the outside of his leg. I gotta admit: I'm a little curious and I'd really like to see it. Perhaps at the parent conference.

The panther tattoo reminds me of my sister-in-law's college friend who has a tattoo of a tiger on the outside of her leg. Blonde haired, blue eyed, fair skinned, pretty girl...with a BIG ACE tiger on her leg. Forever. Until she's 83. Now, can anyone please tell me the level of logic that makes this acceptable? I think not.

Yeah...the snot, the pee, the neediness, the impatience...it's all worth it because of funny stuff like speaking in Chinese and sharing about your parents' tats. I have parent teacher conferences tomorrow, and instead of freaking out about how horrible of a teacher I am and how these kids are never going to learn and how we're behind and I have to tutor them and work with the low ones, I get to look parents in the eye and tell them that their kiddo can READ! Bam!

And they give me hugs. And they tell me I'm pretty even when I am not. Everyone likes a five-year-old that lies.