Just Some Observations

Seriously, it's like people are TRYING to have children out of wedlock. It's like the girl says, "You know what sounds like fun? Let's just play roulette and see if I can't make my dad come after you with a rifle."

Or maybe that's just what my dad would do. Except that it would be more like a pellet pistol.

Matthew McConaughey knocked a girl up and the hot Victoria's Secret girl (not like I needed to use 'hot' as an adjective there) is now preggers! This only adds to the extremely long list of 'celebrities' with just too much time on their hands. Or not enough money to afford acceptable birth control.

Another observation: I want to go on American Idol...subscribing to the foolishness of how great one thinks one can sing when one is alone in the car with the music blaring...because I watched it tonight (I WATCHED TV!) and they were horrible! That Simon Cowell knows what he's talking about. Plus, he's got that endearing British accent.

And lastly: I LOVE ME SOME COLLEGE BASKETBALL! Just when I'm beginning to fill the pit in my stomach caused by the end of college football, the sports world is alive with BASKETBALL! It does my soul some good to know that March Maddness is not too far away. Except that my team is losing at this moment to my least favorite university in existence. It is an away game for my team and I suspect there is a sniper in the arena and someone put something in the water to cause us to have 13 turnovers in the first half alone. 13, people! We have the better part of the second half to pull out a W, so you're telling me there's a chance.

From unexpected buns in the oven to 'pitchy singing Dawg' to college hoops...I feel a little better about my life today.

Be Still...

Several irons in the fire. Don't know when to quit. Go go go. Nonstop. Achieve. Higher. More. GIVE ME MORE.

Yup, that's how I view life. I once decided that if I achieve and go and do more then the life that I want will hurry up and get here. If I can just check off the boxes of things to do in life...If I can just power through today, then tomorrow will get here...and...maybe...

Tomorrow. Maybe. Just maybe it will happen.

The kicker is that I still think that I have never missed out on the life that I've been given (or the life that I've chosen) because it's been fast and furious and busy the last couple of years. It's what I like. I'm proud of it. But too proud? What is the definition of too proud? How much should I do? When do I just stop and Be Still?

Last night I decided that I needed to Be Still. Psalm 46:10 says "Be still and know that I am God." I'm sure we know that verse well...perhaps have it committed to memory. But how often are you still? I can't be the only one here that is in a constant state of motion and getaheadedness. (Yes, it's a word.) So I meditated on that...prayed on it...and that lasted for the minutes before bed. I'll be still when I sleep, I think. But not now...there's too much to do.

Stillness. It's something I fear. I think that if I'm still, I'm missing out. I'm not proactive. I'm not achieving, I'm wasting precious time, I'm not becoming better. Better than what? Well that, I don't know. But I fear that I'm going to get behind...behind someone, miss out on something, not the best person I can be and that is unacceptable. But what if all the GO GO GO has caused me to not be alert enough to see something else?

Well, I think God has provision in that. I don't know if I've missed something...thought I don't feel I have...but recently I hear something that tells me, "Sit. Be still. Rest." God provides in giving me the right time and right place to Be Still. Recover.

I don't know the last time I napped or rested on a weekend...except when I was sick. I tried to rest today when I came home from school. And by rest I mean sit down. I sat down on the yoga ball (why sit in a chair when you can sit on a bouncy ball to work your midsection?). Pretty promplty, I realized I needed to check email, then I contacted people on house stuff, jumped rope literally 1,000 times, and packed tons of boxes (Oh my holy...I had forgotten and underestimated the magnitude of kitchen gear I've accumulated). I could not rest. (However, during dinner preparation and eating I did watch 'Scott Baio is 46 and Pregnant' and it is SPECTACULAR TELEVISION PROGRAMMING. Perhaps my senses to TV are deadened since I don't know the last time I watched a TV program that was not sports. Please go watch the Baio.)

So, my new plan is to make sure that I sit down for at least 30 minutes every day. Not reading at night before bed, not packing, not thinking about house or email or blog or school or LIFE. I even found a place to sit. Look, an unobstructed chair!

The chair is a far better option (well, the ONLY option) since the rest of my domicile looks like this...

So, I'm going to sit and Be Still. Today. And tomorrow. And the day after.

And when I sit, I want to know that He is God. Doesn't that sound nice?

Double Trouble

I just babysat the two most endearing identical twin girls ever created by God. No, not Mary Kate and Ashley.

I rocked little Morgan to sleep and then she woke up because she wanted more time with me. After her bottle, which she most pleasantly took, she just nuzzled next to my neck and let me rub her back. She made sweet, "ahhhhhhhh" noises as she filled her lungs with big, deep breaths and then drifted off into sleep. It's like she just wanted me to come over and hold her. I told her I loved her.

And then Taylor woke up and she asked me to rock her to sleep, too. She kept her eyes on mine and said she was glad I'm friends with her momma. I'm glad I'm friends with her momma, too. Taylor was asleep in no time but I held on to her a bit longer to smell her sweet baby and formula smell. I wish they could bottle that special little scent into an elixir. I told her I loved her, too.

Five month old babies do crazy things to a lady. Even the most rational, busy, and independent of women can't resist soft skin and little hands gripping your finger. It's like God is telling you, "Yes...I want you to do this one day." It stirs the most genuine of longings.

I remember in college how Loop called me to tell me, "You won't ever believe this but I met the COOLEST GUY! I'm sending you a picture right now...go check your email!" I told my roommates that I needed to drive to see her STAT because I was afraid aliens had infiltrated my most stable and ungirly of friends. And here she was just GUSHING about some random "dude who is SO FUNNY AND SO COOL." Seriously, it was like Loop was having an out of body experience...and I was too.

It's Morgan and Taylor's parents' third anniversary on January 15 and they have created this most precious family. I'm so glad they're here to let me share life with them.

Happy annivesary, Loop! You make a great momma. Dude, and that husband of your's is such a COOL AND FUNNY DUDE! Dude.



Post Script: Comprehensive List of Men We Love (or Think Are Hot) is in the draft stages. It is sweet my friends...gloriously and breathtakingly sweet.

Comprehensive List. Wow.

Here it is. I tried to wait for the last few people's picks...but the excitement just got to me. Enjoy, dear friends. And have a napkin ready to catch your drool.

I barely have words. But it's me, so of course I can think of something to say. Great work, everyone!

Josh Hartnett. "He had me at Pearl Harbor."

Matt Damon. "All around good guy. Loves his family and baseball!"

John Krasinski. "He's tall, funny, has an infectious smile and loves life." I personally ditto this and might steal him for my Top 5. This picture is more Jim Halpert, but it is why we love him even more.

Jesse Palmer. "He's BEAUTIFUL. Not just hot, but perfection. AND he loves sports!"

Patrick Dempsey. "Cute as can be and seems to be a good husband and dad."

I took the liberty of adding the next one even though I already picked 3.

Brady Quinn. I'm sorry...do you expect me to say something?

Tom Cavanagh. "A little piece of me will always reach out to him. My Special Ed."

Drew Daniel. From the cult classic Big Brother. There has been no finer winner (or player).

Amen.

My List

I don't really know how to title My List. But this is My List. I'm only going with three...though I'm sure I could force the issue with five. I would REALLY love for you guys to share your lists with me because...well...it's fun.

And I would like to know that I'm not crazy for thinking this. Like...all the time.

1. Josh Duhamel. Even though he's with Fergie Ferg. She looks rode hard and put up wet.


2. Thad Luckinbill. Because I will always and forever be in love with Young and the Restless.


3. And the always constant favorite...the comic who will always have my heart...even though he just got married and my soul cried a little...

Jimmy Fallon

Who is on Your List? And I do expect answers.

The Most Perfect Union

My kindergarten class started out really precious this week. But by Thursday...my patience has run thin. Four short days...it's like Santa stole their ability to raise their hands.

I tried to be calm and loving...gentle and kind. But the shrill volume, my word, the shrill volume.

You know what makes it better? Sporks.

It's the most useful untensil ever created. At our 10:30am "lunch", I am reunited with this fine form of cutlery and all is well in the world.

I'm considering buying sporks to use as my daily plasticware.

Pay it Back

As the saying goes..."Payback's a ditch." Or something like that. Let me share the ways that I've been paid back unpleasantly. I know...you can't wait to read this!

Payback #1. Since the students I teach are 5 and 6-years-old, I like to be above professional reproach and ask them personal questions that I know I can deny later. For example, I will ask kids about their home life, parents, siblings, etc, knowing full well that if they tell their parents that I asked this, I can respond with, "Ha! Kids say the funniest things! Listen to what they told me about you..." I was paid back today. Here's my converstaion with a couple of kids and they got way too personal.

Kid 1: Have you seen 'Enchanted?'
Miss Rose: No.
Kid 2: Have you seen 'Alvin and the Chipmunks.'
Miss Rose: No. I don't see too many kid movies.
Kid 1: Yeah, cause she doesn't have kids. Because she's not MARRIED.
Miss Rose: (slightly irritated) THANK YOU VERY MUCH LITTLE GIRL. I'M CERTAIN WE ALL NEEDED THAT REMINDER RIGHT NOW. (I was thankful for her rationalization of, no marriage=no kids.)
Kid 2: Is it true that if you don't get married, you'll die sooner?
Miss Rose: (even more irritated) NO IT IS MOST CERTAINLY NOT. You won't die sooner! Where did you hear that?
Kid 2: Kid 3 told me.
Miss Rose: Kid 3 get over here right now!
Kid 3: What?
Miss Rose: (to Kid 3, possibly the sweetest kid, but at this particular moment, he was a punk) Don't you say "what?" to me! Say, "Yes" or "Yes ma'am!" Why are you telling Kid 2 that people who aren't married will die sooner?
Kid 3: I don't know. (runs away, leaving Miss Rose puzzled and more irritated. Punk.)
Miss Rose: (to Kid 2) Why are you asking honey?
Kid 2: Because Kid 3 said if you hug you'll get married and I don't want to get married.
Miss Rose: I hug you guys all the time! It doesn't mean I'll marry you. It's just how you show someone you are proud of them or appreciate them or love them.
Kid 2: Okay. Well, I don't want to kiss anyone.
Miss Rose: You are too young to be kissing...let alone worry about marriage. Go home and talk to your parents about this. Miss Rose is spent. Go play with the blocks or taste glue.

Honest to goodness...that was a FOR REAL conversation I had today...okay, maybe not the part about tasting glue. And someone once told me that teaching Kindergarten wasn't mentally challenging. Well...you try answering life's questions to a 5-year-old. I was also asked today, "Why do people die?"

Payback #2. I have been having a hard time eating recently. Today was a little girl's birthday and she brought cupcakes and I decided to give it a shot. At 2:30pm, I consumed the most superb flour-sugar-water concoction I've ever put into my mouth. I attacked that thing with all the fury of a tornado in Kansas. I didn't even regret that my tongue, lips, and mouth were blue from the pure sugar and cream deliciousness that was once icing.

My payback came at 4:45pm, when that tasty little nugget was securly lodged under my right ribcage around mile 1 of the 4 mile run. I just remembered that Hannah-Montana-cupcake-perfection and kept on trucking.

Payback #3: I realize that through the years, I have avoided many phonecalls from 'gentleman callers' we shall say. It was just easier for me to not respond instead of having an uncomfortable 2 minute conversation. Well, I recognize now that I was a sleaze for not dignifying them with a response and a verbal, "No thank you." It's common human decency to give that to someone. Paybacks a serious ditch on this one because all the times I did that balled into one and I wasn't given a goodbye or a second thought or any remorse. Lesson learned...don't burn guys because they'll burn you back.

Payback #4. I was catcalled no less than 5 times today while I was out running. Lots of stares going on, too. I got a honk from the waste management specialist (aka Trashman), a honk AND A PULLOVER and "HEY!" by two workers in a green truck (admittedly, I picked up speed when they pulled over), a honk from a dude in a blue car (though I think I knew the person), and a wave from someone else. But my FAVORITE of the day was from two dudes in a red truck who yelled out the window, "I SEE YOU BABY! SHAKING THAT..." Oh yeah. They said it. I laughed. And waved. I wanted to stop them to see if they wanted my number. Truly, I'm just glad that the two high school kids thought so highly of a 27-year-old, that they'd jeer. It actually made me feel good...yeah, I still got it.

The payback comes from when I was visiting my college town and there was this cute boy running down the side of the road and I did a quadruple-take and announced to all my friends in the car, "DANG! I miss College Town. There are hot guys everywhere!" To my credit, I didn't lean out the window or honk or solicit myself to the nice young man. I thought about it though. Come to find out that the hot, young man was one of my best friend's future husband. Shout out to E!

Moral here folks: Kharma, pay backs, logic. Watch what you do and say because it's all coming back at ya!